the night is silent as i lie in bed waiting.. trying hard to sleep but failing to do so.. occasionally the sound of doors being opened can be heard and everytime i hope it is my door that is being opened.. yet it hardly ever is.. why i subject myself to such false hope i hardly know.. to have your hopes disappointed time and again is a terrible feeling but then again, to have hope is what keeps most of us going..
i used to be an independent person, someone who is able to do things alone.. nowadays, me being alone just serves as a sad reminder of how little time we spend together and this is only my third week at work.. the fact is that the situation is not going to change, not at least for another 18months, but i still desperately hope that it will..
things can be so difficult at times and the future feels so uncertain.. all i know is that we cant go on like that, me working in the day and you at night.. what will happen to our relationship? how are we going to build a relationship based on seeing each other for 15mins a day?
argh.. im having a bad headache while writing this.. must be from the blood loss of my period.. and all this emo talk is likely a result of my period hormones too.. but in my defence, it is officially 1am and you are not home and you have not even msgd me or whatever.. helloooo????? do you remember you have a wife???? and you blame me for being moody.. pleaseeeee.. think again..
ma-timilai-maya-garchu 